January 2-5, 1999

No journal entries.

 

January 6  Punished in the Hole

For 2 days and nights I laid on the floor of a 6’ x 7’ perpetually luminated cement cell staring at the shit stained walls and breathing in air that reeked of urine.  The cell contained only a filthy toilet and a mattress that oozed of a brown foul smelling liquid.  I was allowed neither books to be read nor cigarettes to smoke (and I understand that is a right of most if not all other such institutions in this country). 

To be locked in there alone is punishment enough, but without cigarettes for me, it was torture.  I know it’s a cliché, but I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy and I don’t understand how the punishment can be handed out as loosely as it was by Mr. Graves  It was beyond all reason and I am bitter about it.

Question on being assigned to Max security

It appears that I have been classified as a maximum security inmate although I have no record of violence, escapes, etc.  What a silly place this is.

Why is it that [Guard 5] has to take in child molesters in her unit because it is her job while in medium they are allowed to assemble their choice of inmates.  Apparently, medium sees itself as some sort of exclusive club.  Apparently, they can pick and choose the inmates for its preferred membership.  How does one get a membership? 

I have never committed an act of violence.  How is it that I am now a maximum security inmate.  I would appreciate it if you would explain to me the basis for this policy.  I have followed the proper procedures / chain of command so I believe I am entitled to a response from you.  Please put it in words. 

What it is that I’ve done that is so serious that I have been banned from a unit?

Letter to Zeke, the dog

Reg loved to toy with the guards and staff at Sleepy Hollow, so he decided to write a letter to his dog, Zeke. This joke, was something that they could not understand and they subseqently sent him for psychiatric evaluation - he turned out to be normal.

 

January 1999,

Dear Zeke:

Hi Zeke. How are ya doing? Pretty cold out isn't it? You're lucky you got all that fur. Did Santa bring you bones for Christmas?

I bet you're happy if he did. You're wagging your tail aren't you? How about if Victoria gets you a COOKIE? You SIT and still get you a COOKIE. SIT Zeke SIT.

That's a good doggie. Say hi to Max for me, ok?

See ya, Reggie

January 16

I saw something curious on the calendar by the desk this evening.  It has “Reg to Max” written in on the 8^th.  I came here on the fourth and so I’m thinking it may have been planned that I come here as [Guard1] had hinted.  George gave me some good advice which I will use in my meeting with [Guard1].

Called home this evening.  Heard that Gaylene quit her job.  Good news.  Also glad that I sent her second letter to sort of apologize.  Now the focus is on why [Janine] let her take the job in the first place.  My letters to the kids and Zeke [his Nova Scotia Duck Retriever dog] arrived ok.  They say Zeke was glad to hear from me. 

Ambrose will be coming in for a visit on Tuesday which I look forward to.  I’m not keen on the plan to move me to minimum.  I hope it can be avoided as I am quite content here.  I’d like to remain here at least until John leaves.  I’m finding that the weekends are kind of peaceful now.  The regular week brings with it stress mostly from dealing with [Supervisor] and [nurse1].  Why can’t we all get along.

January 17 - "Reg learns Japanese"

We had a minor squabble in our unit today.  One of the guards, rookie, told me to clean up my room or he would charge me.  All the guys were offended and said if I was going to the hole they’de be going tool  So Lorrie intervened and we did clean up the mess.  Funny, I would rather have a messy room than a clean one.

No visitors again today, but none were really expected, except possibly Art or Anne.  Sent out a few more letters this evening, now I wait and see what happens.

No drugs around here today which is both good and bad.  I just had a piss test a couple of days ago so I should be safe for a month, but you never know...

... I spent an hour or so today copying Japanese words and phrases and their translation out of “Shogun”.  I’m learning some Japanese just from reading that book. 

I’m interested in learning other languages, perhaps Polish, Japanese, and, well, I’m not sure what else.  It’s not very practical around here (except Japanese) but in a bigger city it would be.

I’m not really looking forward to tomorrow.  I have to meet with [Supervisor] and [Guard1] and somehow avoid their plans to move me to minimum.  I like it here in max and would prefer to stay here for a few more weeks.

January 18

Still haven’t been allowed to make a call to Holland College.  This is pissing me off.  I’m apprehensive about taking a correspondence course if it is going to be difficult to correspond.  I think they’re playing with my head.  No word about moving today.  [nurse1] was out too, in a meeting.  That’s what Jennifer said.  She’d make a much better nurse than [nurse1].  I was kind of annoyed during our poker game today.  I thought they were taking it just a bit too serious.  I’m wondering if I’m getting a bit depressed.  I just don’t feel normal.

I hope they will stop fucking around with my medication.  There  is no need of this bullshit.  This is something I should talk to Ambrose about.  I’m looking forward to seeing him tomorrow.

January 19

All I had to look forward to today was a visit from Ambrose but he didn’t come.  I was disappointed.  As it turns out, [Supervisor] didn’t call him to confirm the visit until this afternoon and by then it was too late.  Now I’m pissed off.  Never heard anything today about being moved.  I’m wondering what’s up with that. 

Finally, I was able to make some phone calls to schools.  I got three answering machines.  One of them returned my call.  They’re fussy here about long distance calls so I hope the others call tomorrow. It would be nice to get something started.  I’m getting a wee bit bored, a bit tired of playing games.  I need some sort of challenge for my brain.  I crave knowledge and information.  Tomorrow I see the doctor about my pills again.  Tomorrows just another day.

January 20

Got some advice from one of the staff today suggesting I check to see if my letter to the medical society got out.  As I had expected, things just aren’t right around here.  I think I have my medication back to normal after seeing the doctor here today.  Jennifer filled in as the nurse today so I didn’t have to see the bitch ([nurse1]).  She’ll be sorry for the way she treated me, all of us.

We put in a request for Greg today to see the nurse about hemorroids and got a good laugh out of it.

I won a bunch of cigarettes playing poker which I traded for a meal and a piece of cheesecake, and Greg has to carry my tray back after breakfast.

I received mail from Durham College today about the creative writing course.  Now I must decide whether to take it or not.  The problem is that it may require research material which is hard to get from in here.

I’m thinking that I may plan, in my parole application, to attend Holland College and go to Talbot House.  I think this plan would get me out sooner and then (in the meantime) I could work on other plans.  I think that would be the fastest route out of here, although that will still take three months.

 

January21

 My 90^th day here and still I’m no closer to getting parole.  I’ve decided to change my strategy and make plans to live on PEI which I will after I get out.

My mother was here this afternoon.  It was a max visit since [Supervisor] didn’t get back to me about an open one.

Thought I might get hold of some pills tonight but it was not to be.  Maybe that’s a good thing, but it doesn’t seem like it.  The other guys are pretty disappointed.  We don’t have much to look forward to in here.  Drugs are very desirable.

It seems that we’re all getting sick of board games.  The ones we played today ended poorly. I’m glad that tomorrow is Friday, as I’ve come to look forward (sort of) to the weekends in here.

January 22

I got kinda pissed off playing cards today.  Sometimes Tyler can be a bit hard on the head.  So I took a long nap which I may regret if I have trouble sleeping.

No drugs arrived so we didn’t get high but I would like to see some before John goes to court.

Called Wayne tonight but he wasn’t home.  Must talk to him soon, see what he’s up to.

[nurse1] seems kinda cold to me when she brings the pills now.  I hope she got in shit because of my letter.  I mean, because of the way she behaved.  She was working tonight which is unusual for her.  Her schedule has been kind of erratic this week.  I wonder what’s up with that.

January 23

Again we played games all day.  We learned a new card game – prediction.

At lunch every put their deserts – pudding – on my tray.  I think they’re trying to get me fat.  It was good that I ate them cause we had stew for supper.  Garbage.

My mother told me tonight that a meeting is planned on Monday with her, Dr. Smith, Lorrie, [nurse1], [Supervisor], and Verna.  Sounds kinda strange to me.  I’m not sure what it’s about but I haven’t done anything wrong so there’s nothing to worry about.  But I’m curious.  Maybe somehow, it’ll help my parole.  I’ve been here for three months now and I can’t even send in the application yet.

I think I’m allowed an open visit tomorrow but I don’t know if anyone is coming.  I thought mum was going to bring Steven and [Valerie] but she’s working tomorrow evening so I don’t know.

 

January 24

We were watching a tv show about Angola Prison in Louisiana tonight.  Makes me glad to be a Canadian and glad to be a white guy, of course.  Things could be a lot worse.

No visitors today.  I didn’t really expect anyone but I was hoping someone would come.  So quickly we’re forgotten.

I went outside again today.  Yesterday, John and Tyler dragged me out.  I had made a commitment to myself not to go outside till spring but uh, well, they wanted me to come out.

Tomorrow is the day of the meeting.  I wonder what it’s about.  I wonder …

January 25

It’s Johns last day here.  Tomorrow morning he goes to court to be sentenced, likely to Springhill.  I really liked being in Johns unit.  He’s entertaining and funny.  I hope we meet again sometime.  For now, I’m glad to have met him.

The woman who runs minimum, Elsie, was here to see me about moving to minimum.  I told her I didn’t want to go.  I told her about the problems I was having with books and the parole application and she said she’d look into it for me, which was nice of her, at least there’s someone here who wants to help.

We had the meeting this afternoon:  me, mum, [Supervisor], Verna, John, [nurse1], psychologist (idiot).  I don’t think I really got any answers, just the same old bullshit.  But maybe it’ll help to make things go a little smoother.

It looks like they’ll find out about my parole – what’s going on with the assessment.  I gave my mother a Holland College application to submit so hopefully things will fall into place.

We played some games and had some arguments.  I think sometimes they take these games too seriously, but then I guess we’re all under a bit of stress.

I was at church tonight (I hate it).  Noel told me that Rob is in minimum, so I think I might try and get there after about 6 weeks in medium, if things go my way.  Noels getting on parole after 3 months.  I hope my application doesn’t take any longer than that.  Either way it looks like I’m here for at least 3 more months.

January 26

 I got up early to see John off this morning.  And he went.  But, as things turned out, his sentencing was put off until next Wednesday so he came back this afternoon.  And now everything is as it was before.

The board games and card games are getting a bit boring now.  I think I’m ready for a change.  I’d like to go to minimum cuz Robs there but I think I’d rather be in medium cause it’s not as crowded and everyone gets their own cell.  There’s no way I’m sharing a cell.  Hopefully within a week or so I’ll be moving on.

I’ve heard that Wayne C. is coming here this week so I should be able to submit my parole application next week and get that underway.

I was talking to Wayne on the phone this evening.  Not much going on with him.  Too bad that we can’t be hanging around with each other but that’s life.  Maybe we can meet up in Ontario this summer and carry on from there.  So much to do when this is over.  A whole world to explore, people to meet, adventures to take … sure would like a beer right now.

January 27

Wayne Clark showed up today and told me that he doesn’t want me at the Detox.  Prick.  Says, of course, I’m not motivated – standard rehab rejection.  I don’t understand what they expect from me.  And it appears he believes rumors about Mike selling drugs to or buying drugs from me or whatever it is.  SO it looks like I’ll have to come up with a new plan for parole.  Perhaps its better this way as I’m really sick of treatment anyway.

I saw Rob today, working in the kitchen.  Now, I’m interested in moving to minimum.  Rob says it’s ok there and Elsie seems nice enough.  I think it’s time for a change anyway.  The days seem to be getting a bit longer here.

(Reg also received a response from the Provincial Government related to his complaint of Dec. 26, 1998, that inmates had to share and re-use disposable razors, which is an obvious health hazard)

January 28

I’ll be glad when the weekend gets here.  Everyday seems to get a bit longer. 

Today I called Irene [at Talbot House] and she told me that I would have to take a program to get out of here.  I hope they’ll take me in Souris.

Summerside is a possibility too but it’s inconvenient and would surely take longer to get an answer from than Souris.  I should have a bit of pull in Souris.

Getting really tired of playing games here but they always insist that I play.  I can’t even get time for a nap during the day.  Ah well …

January 29

I found out today that I will be moving to minimum.  I asked if I could stay here in Max till Monday and I’m still here tonight so it looks like they gave me what I wanted, which kind of surprised me.

One of the guards today told me that I should have directed my complaint about [nurse1] to the Nurses Union.  So I think I’ll rewrite my letter and send it that way.

We got a new guy in our unit today, Mike.  Now I’ve got someone to fill in for me when I don’t want to play board games.

So all is well here, the weekend is here, I don’t have to get up for breakfast tomorrow, everything’s alright.

 

January 30

I called home tonight and I really got annoyed.  My mother doesn’t want me to try and get me into the Souris Detox.  She’s been programmed by Wayne C..  It looks like now my only hope is to apply to Summerside, but I’m doubtful that they will take me.  Nobody wants me, except Sleepy Hollow.  Although, I should call the John Howard Society and see if they can do anything for me.  I’m trying to remain optimistic but sometimes it’s tough.  It seems like the system will never let me go.

 

January 31

Tomorrow, I go to minimum.  My feelings about this are mixed.  I like it here and get along good with everybody, but if I’m ever to get parole I have to be in medium or minimum.  I’m really confused about the parole.  It looks like more treatment is necessary but I just want to get on with my life.  I want the system to let go of me so I can get on with my life. 

I recalculated my parole eligibility dates today and it looks like I may not be eligible for day parole till February 28 and full till June 4.  I had originally been told that I would be eligible for day parole February 1 (tomorrow) but now I’m not sure.  The jail and the parole board have different ways of calculating sentence length.  Tomorrow, I shall call Brian S. and hope there’s some way he can help.